Living day by day

I've been struggling with living in the present right now for all my thoughts are based in the future.

Where will I be teaching?
Should I move?
Am I ready?
Where should I apply?
How do I set myself apart from other candidates?
What do I even want?

These are all questions that fill and take over my day. Instead I should be enjoying my last two terms in college and have faith that whatever is going to happen is meant to be, but I can't stop stressing and obsessing over it. It's crazy knowing that in as little as four months I could be living somewhere else and about to begin my first year in my career. There are just so many options and I'm not sure how do to decide what I truly want and what is best for me.

Childhood Friends

There's nothing better than going back home and getting to see and catch up with all your best friends. Childhood friends are unlike adult friends because they've been with you for what feels like for forever. They were with you through your awkward middle school phase, and for someone to still be my friend after what I looked like in that stage of my life says a lot. They know you better than anyone else and it doesn't matter how long it's been since you've talked or seen them. They're there for you through everything.

This past weekend I went home and got to see my four best friends and let me tell you they're amazing people. Spending time with them is the best way for me to de-stress and revamp myself for school.

Week 6

Week 6

Homework piling up,
Procrastination building,
Motivation decreasing,

Week 6

Finals coming,
Over stressing,
Under preparing,

Week 6

Library going,
Coffee drinking,
Sleep lacking,

Week 6

Writing,
Reading,
Speaking,
Sharing.

Is it Spring Break yet?

Valentine's

There's nothing better than coming back to your classroom after a couple of days and being greeted by friendly smiles and hugs. All the students had brought something that they were so excited to show and share with me. One boy brought a collection of cars, another brought some rocks, and one other wore his grandpa's belt buckle.

Two little girls were hastily working with some red construction paper that they trying very hard to keep obscured from me. They were busy giggling, cutting, and talking together while taking quick glances at the other student teacher and me. After a couple of minutes, I was tapped on my shoulder and presented a red heart that read, "Dear Miss Nickles you are my valentine hope you don't feel a pine."I read and reread the message over and over again trying to make comprehension of it, but it wasn't making sense. Finally, my friend told me that they were trying to rhyme.

Oh to be a kitten

What joy would it be to live life like a kitten? Simple pleasures. Get rubbed all the time. No worries. No commitments. No responsibilities. It sounds like bliss to me, especially on days like today that are filled with tired eyes from homework and a hungry stomach from laziness of not wanting to cook.

I love my kitten. She is so happy and fun. Today she spent about 3 hours playing with a ping pong ball and an empty paper towel roll. I have countless technologies and things that should keep my attention but I still find myself in a state of boredom after about 10 minutes of anything.

No matter how long I leave her in the tiny room, with her only company being a washer and dryer, she always runs to me purring excited for attention. I don't think my boyfriend would still love me if I locked him in a tiny room for 6 hours.

New Class

Walking in
to 27 bright faces.
All eyes on me
waiting for direction.
Some burning questions
stir in me head.
Who trusted me
to teach a classroom?
What class did I take
that could prepare me
for this?
A boy lays
giggling on the floor.
Another is standing,
no jumping on a chair.
A boy just shoved
all his books off his desk.
Here comes the principal
to take one to his office.
18 boys.
7 girls.
Welcome to 2nd grade!

What an original resolution

Like so many others, I have made a New Year's Resolution to eat better and exercise more, but what does that mean. Having such a broad goal makes it hard to evaluate my success because how do you measure your "healthiness?" These first two weeks I've done amazing at staying true to my goal, but I know as the year dwindles on my stress and workload will increase shifting my focus onto that instead of my goal. To help measure my goal and help keep me accountable, I've decided to make a couple long-term goals and many short-term goals. My plan is to really focus on one-short term goal a week. My short-term goals are going to be revisited as often as needed until it becomes a habit. Here are some of my goals:

Long-term:

Be able to do 20 regular push ups in a row
Have a visible four-pack
Completely give up fast food
Be able to do all three splits again
Be able to do five pull ups

Short-term:

Drink four bottles of water a day
Do yoga 4 days a week
Do girl push-ups and abs every night for ten minutes
Try a new type of exercise
Have only one cheat day a week
Drink a green smoothie every day
Practice my splits
Go to the gym 5 days a week
Get a workout buddy
Try a new recipe

Today I woke up had a bowl of cereal and made a green spinach for my three hour lecture. For lunch, I had chicken, black beans, salsa, and corn with spices and triscuits. Then, back to class for another three hours for which I packed carrots. I find that if I pack healthy snacks I will most definitely eat them because I have nothing else to tempt me like I do at my house.

After class, I had an apple and peanut butter for a snack and then it was off to Zumba. Zumba completed my trying a new type of exercise short-term goal and I was not prepared for it at all. I consider myself to be in decent shape, but I'm used to more weight lifting, not cardio. I was sweating in places I didn't even know I could and was struggling to keep up. It was sad to see how far I've fallen from my days as a dancer, but it's never to late to renew those skills I guess.

After Zumba, I went straight to a volleyball game for a city league team. It was another blast from the past. I played volleyball for 10 years and club volleyball for 4 so I thought it was going to be a cake walk. I was wrong, again. Instead of playing against 40 year olds, our opposing team was a group of freshmen college girls who had all played volleyball in high school. The game resulted in them winning 2 of the three games, me re-realizing how competitive I am, a swollen knee and two skid marks.

That night, after an asian chicken salad dinner, my boyfriend and I did our nightly yoga routine. Doing yoga was his resolution to help him stretch out and become more flexible. If you ever need cheap entertainment have a 6'8" basketball player do yoga. It's hilarious. It's also really nice to be better than your boyfriend in one physical element.

I love how I'm learning to enjoy working out. My routines are rarely the same and I'm constantly trying and learning new things. I feel better, I'm reading ingredient labels, I'm increasing my vegetable intake, but I'm still enjoying my food. The challenge will be keeping my motivation level up and prioritize my life.